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Handling Two Girls at Once
In this issue, we're going to take another whimsical trip through the RSD mailbag. So, without any further ado, let's take our first caller:
*** QUESTION ***
This is Alfredo from the November NYC workshop. Hows it going? I've been going out solo on weekdays and doing a lot of 2 sets.
Now, I understand the logic behind not splitting a 2 set, so what I been doing is trying to minivenue change both girls and running comfort&trust game on both girls, then number closing one or both.
Is this the best way to handle 2 sets without a wing, or is there something better I am not thinking of?
Thanks in advance, Alfredo
>>>>>> MY REPLY:
Good to hear from you Alfredo. Even better to hear that you've been going out and building on everything you learned at the workshop.
Now, to address your question.
First off, it's good that you understand the logic behind not wanting to split a two-set. This is something that a lot of guys simply don't understand.
A fundamental rule of pickup is that everyone involved in the interaction must be having fun. If that condition isn't met, BOOM... you're blown out.
This is why the girl's peer group is key to your success. If the peer group loves you, they're not going to pose any problems for you later on when it's time to isolate her. Furthermore, if they love you, they can even actively HELP you by shooting down competitors and so on.
Now, in a two-set of girls, you're in kind of a sticky situation in the sense that you have to keep both of them occupied at all times. The minute you try to isolate one of them, the other one is going to get bored and attempt to get her friend's attention back.
There are a couple ways to approach this.
One, you could do what you've been doing already, which is to game BOTH of them, paying a little more attention to the one that you want. Conversely, you may want to pay more attention to the one you DON'T want, as a subtle form of active disinterest and to help ensure you have that peer approval. Just watch out on this one... you might get a situation where the hot girl backs off so her less-attractive friend can have a chance with you... definitely don't want THAT happening.
At the same time, you'll notice that sometimes, the friend isn't a factor. Meaning, your target is so into you that it doesn't matter. I've had this happen to me several times, where the girl I was talking to actually ditched her friends to leave with me.
This is the exception to the rule, however... not really something you'd want to rely on.
So another little trick that I'll sometimes employ when I go out solo, is to recruit an "insta-wing"... just add beer!
What I mean by this is that I'll befriend some random guy who seems to have his shit together on at least a BASIC level.
Use basic opening and attract skills (yes this stuff works on guys, too... lol), have a drink with the guy, shoot the breeze, then encourage him to do some approaches with you.
Now, you've got ready-made entertainment for the other girl, so you can work on yours.
Don't worry if the guy's game isn't super-tight. As long as it doesn't COMPLETELY suck, you should be okay.
In fact, if he's mediocre, it can actually help you, making you look that much cooler by comparison.
*** SUCCESS STORY ***
This relates to a workshop a few weeks back (I've finally managed to find time to sit down and type... I'm going to be knackered at lectures tomorrow ... but hey why sleep when you can kj)
Despite having done a lot of approaches prior to the workshop, I managed to have my view of pickup and my own game shredded into tiny fragments.
The weekend was an emotional-roller coaster ride of MASSIVE proportions.
There were so many sets and so many experiences but I have annotated some key points below:
- Evening 1: Winging with Tyler. I picked up a number of things which I thought were integral to my game improving:
1) Being super playful and laid back.
2) Having tight-as-fuck smooth body language.
3) Having a structure that flows smoothly.
4) Balancing High octane with rapport.
5) Being authoritative in vocal tonality and owning the frame together with being extremely persistent.
The first night went quite badly for me initially as pretty much all my sets bombed early on but things improved as the night wore on.
I met Randy at one of the venues and did a few sets with him commenting and advising. They gave me some solid advice (particularly in terms of body language and voice projection) and demonstrated some tight game.
Later that night I gamed a 2-set and managed to pull home a stripper.
Overall the workshop rocked. Personally I'd recommend it mostly for the opportunity to see how it's done realtime (a lot of it is very different to what I interpreted just from reading).
- P., London
>>>>>> MY REPLY:
"Later that night I managed to pull home a stripper."
I like how you say that all nonchalant... like it's so commonplace it bores you... "Went to the store, picked up some cat food and a stripper."
It's funny, because a lot of guys tend to have similar experiences when they take the programs.
They start out very confused and frustrated with their game. These are guys who KNOW they should be getting laid, they're successful guys who have their shit together, but there's just something missing.
It's like, just out of your grasp, you can't quite put your finger on it, but you know that if you could just figure out this last puzzle piece, you'd be getting laid like a rockstar
In other words, getting what you deserve.
On the first day, they're just kind of overwhelmed by all the information we present. A lot of this stuff is so counter-intuitive, but once you get it, flashbulbs start exploding in your head.
It's a complete paradigm shift... and once you know the truth, you'll never be the same again.
And that's a good thing.
As the program goes on, you see the game demonstrated right in front of you so you learn just what's possible, in real time, in the field.
Then we fine-tune your game... eliminating all your weaknesses and correcting all your mistakes. A lot of the time, as in your case, it's just a matter of getting the fundamentals down: fixing your body language, watching your tonality and vocal projection, etc.
After that, all the pieces just fall into place.
For a lot of guys, by the end of the workshop they've undergone a COMPLETE TRANSFORMATION, from average and frustrated to near-supernatural in their ability to attract beautiful women.
I've seen it hundreds of times, and more importantly, it's something that I've gone through myself.
It might seem like I'm exaggerating here, but when you first learn these techniques, it feels like you've been granted magic powers or something.
But it's not magic. It's just the application of the field-tested, empirically verifiable tactics developed through YEARS of trial and error.
That's right... for the past several years, the Real Social Dynamics Executive Coaches have been in the field EVERY NIGHT, refining and honing our skills, cutting away the fat until we've distilled it down to what amounts to the most comprehensive, effective method for pick-up ever devised.
Instantly Profit From Our YEARS of Hard Work!
There is a way to jump the learning curve, and this is it.
To learn more about Real Social Dynamics workshops, visit our website at:
*** QUESTION ***
I thought alot about what you mentioned about me having to improve on frame control, kino, and facial expressions. These are based on the five principles of body language, tonality, frame control, rapport, and blueprint. How would one improve on these?
It would help a great amt!
Thanks. RSD student SanFran Dec 2004 Lup M.
>>>>>> MY REPLY:
All right, man, I'm gonna go through each of these one by one, okay?
First, how to improve on frame control.
Frame control is one of the hardest things to learn, so don't beat yourself up too much for not having it down cold yet!
Remember, when we talk about your "frame", what we mean is the way you perceive things happening externally. Depending on your frame, different things can take on different meanings.
For example, say someone makes an attempt to insult you. If your frame is strong, you might interpret it as a joke, and react accordingly. What's funny is that because you interpreted it as a joke, it BECOMES one, not only to you, but to everyone who heard it.
Perception is reality, and the strongest frame always wins.
That said, what's the best way to develop frame control?
That's the thing: it has to be DEVELOPED. You have to make a conscious effort to keep a strong frame whenever you go out until it beomes a habit.
That means making a conscious effort to recognize when conversational threads are not working to your benefit, and CUTTING THOSE THREADS OFF.
That means making a conscious effort to misinterpret everything that is said to you as being complimentary, or funny.
As you force yourself to take on these behaviors, over time you'll become congruent with them, until they become a natural part of your personality.
You also mentioned "kino", which is slang for "kinesthetics", aka touching.
When seducing a woman, it's very important to establish physical contact early on in the interaction so that she doesn't freak when you escalate things later on.
Once that contact's been established, it's equally important to keep moving things forward slowly but surely. You should always be upping the ante, in small increments, while you're spitting your game.
Some tips for escalating things physically:
=> Start small. Your first physical contact with her should be something light and brief. I usually start out with a hi-five or a handshake.
=> Be nonchalant about it. Never LOOK at your hand while you're touching her. Remember, it's just natural human contact, not defusing a bomb.
=> Be FUN, not NEEDY or GROPING. Always try to touch her on a high note, when she's laughing or really engaged by what you're saying.
=> Keep the pressure on. Remember to keep moving things forward, little by little. A lot of guys make the mistake of going too far too quickly, which isn't good. But don't make the opposite mistake and never touch her at all for fear of blowing it. Remember: slow and steady wins the race; get out of your comfort zone.
Again, you just have to make a conscious effort to work on this until it becomes second nature.
Finally, you mentioned facial expressions. You know, you hear that old cliche about body language being 90% of communication all the time, right? Well, facial expressions are a HUGE part of body language.
When I'm interacting with girls, I'm cycling through literally hundreds of different facial expressions in order to better direct the energy of the conversation.
This is so crucial, which is why I recommended you work on it.
Rather than give you specific exercises on how to improve your facial expressions ("stand in front of the mirror and make faces at yourself"), I think I'll try to help you understand WHY facial expressions are so important.
Rhythm, confidence and EXPRESSION are all tied into sexuality.
We have a saying at RSD: Game is your expression of inner state, conveyed by the rhythms you use to direct the energy of the interaction.
That's it. All game comes from within. It's your ability to express it that largely determines your success or failure.
People who are charismatic are very good at expression. Winston Churchill, Tupac Shakur, these were people who were operating internally on a very pure level.
When these people spoke, there was little or no incongruity between the persona they were projecting and who they were internally. As a result, people were magnetically drawn to them.
This is what is ultimately attractive to ALL people.
So basically, what I'm saying here is that you can't be AFRAID to express yourself, because, ironically, that's what ends up causing you to fail.
Think about singers or dancers. Performance is just an extrapolation.
This has significance with regard to frame control as well. Are you starting to see how it all fits together here?
Anyway, keep it up, Lup.
So that about wraps up today's issue. Before I go, I wanna remind you that RSD is more than just workshops... we also offer Individual Bootcamps, which are an incredible value at the current price. This is probably the most inexpensive personal coaching of it's kind on the market today, which is mind-blowing if you consider what you get:
Be immersed in the lifestyle and environment of a world-class pick-up artist as you live with the Real Social Dynamics Executive Coaches for a weekend.
Over three days, you'll be BOMBARDED with TONS and TONS of world-shattering information during the day.
Then you'll undergo a complete fashion and style makeover, to maximize your potential.
Finally, venture out to the clubs and lounges each night to apply what you've learned in REAL TIME, with the Executive Coaches there to guide you and provide critical feedback.
By the end of the weekend, you'll be changed forever.
If you're feeling a strong urge to do this right now, trust that gut instinct and sign up for your Individualized Bootcamp today:
So yeah, that's gonna be all for today, I'm going to Oakland to get some BBQ... till next time, I'm out.
Jeffy, Executive Coach REAL SOCIAL DYNAMICSPS...Do you have any questions or success stories that you'd like to see in this newsletter? Keep it brief, email them to me at email@example.com and I'll answer them personally. I'll provide the solution to any challenge you can possibly put to me. Remember: even if an obstacle seems "big" to you, our team has probably faced it hundreds of times, so we can solve
it in a SNAP.
Copyright 2004/2005 Real Social Dynamics Inc., All Rights Reserved. Real Social Dynamics is a trademark of Real Social Dynamics Inc. You agree to all of the following by accepting and reading this: You understand this to be an expression of opinions and not professional advice. It is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes. You are solely responsible for the use of the ideas, concepts, and content and hold Real Social Dynamics Inc. and all members and affiliates harmless in any event or claim. If you are under the age of 18, please go to the link at the end of this e-letter to stop receiving it or send mail to "RSD" 8491 West Sunset Boulevard, #452, West Hollywood, CA 90069.
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